NEWSLETTER APRIL 2016
DATING ADS FOR SENIORS
I probably shouldn’t print this. But my sister sent it to me some time ago and it is just as too funny keep to myself. The following are dating ads for seniors found in “The Villages” Florida newspaper.
FOXY LADY
Sexy, fashion – conscious, blue – haired beauty, 80’s, slim, 5’4″ (used to be 5’6″), searching for sharp – looking, sharp – dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.
LONG-TERM COMMITMENT
Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband is looking for someone to round out a six – unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.
SERENITY NOW
I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. If you are the silent type, let’s get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.
WINNING SMILE
Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.
BEATLES OR STONES
I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camero on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar. If you are a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let’s get together and listen to my eight – track tapes.
MEMORIES
I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let’s put our two heads together.
MINT CONDITION
Male, 1932 model, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea and valves. Isn’t in running condition, but walks well.
DO NOT REGRET GROWING OLDER. IT IS A PRIVILEGE DENIED TO MANY.
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